Urban Meyer, the Ohio State football coach and winner of three National Championships, explains exactly what the response difference-maker is… “Every minute you spend stressing about the events in your life is a minute you should have spent focusing on your response. The equation teaches something very important about the way life works. We don’t control the events in life, and we don’t directly control the outcomes. But we always have control over how we choose to respond. How we choose or not to choose to respond means everything in that world of all team outcomes.”
We can call it the R Factor.
It’s important to understand that success is not determined by the situations you experience. Those ingredients however significant, are a transitory part of the recipe. Success is determined by how you choose to manage the R in that mixture of any given time and space. So, if you have to be a bear, why not be a grizzly?
Every day you make R Factor decisions. You choose what actions you will take or not take in pursuit of your goals.
Coach Mayer says, “Every day you make decisions about how to respond. And how you respond makes all the difference.
It is the factor that determines the quality of your life…”
Maybe I watch too many John Wayne movies, but it’s a war and peace thing to me. Try to generalize the virtues of war and peace: see where you end up on that trail to insanity; you know-- keep doing the same thing and expecting a unique result.
I am no mathematician so maybe it’s time for a little anecdote here? A short and sweet war story to see if I am getting this?
The event --these guys were riding in an Army tank going down a very steep grade when Murphy’s Law disables the braking and steering mechanism—very little, if any control—the only opposition to a smooth coasting stop is a 300 foot drop and a sudden stop at the bottom; the outcome. To get to another more desired outcome, some very quick and correct responses had to be decided on; the hoped for response and an awareness that something good could happen? Am I on to anything?
The tank story part is simple for the combatant in the R war: it does not happen to be all about movie goers response to glory and cause, ideals and honor: what is a real war story?-- if you know one--- it is a Dear John letter, or not hearing from friends anymore, or hearing strange noises in the dark, or waiting on a dock for badly needed rations and supplies, or getting up on a foggy morning and head into an unknown that is very unpredictable, being scared to death, and being home sick. You are going to respond to some things that will most definably, and could very well, have a rebellious touch on the very next day of your life, sometimes that response is an answer, that smell of awareness, a jumping out of your skin kind of awareness: when the sun gets brighter and the leaves get greener kind of awareness. It could be very obedient and yet uncultivated, but leave a lifetime and symbolic mark on a soul. That R factor will, quite symbolically, get its direction from a moral compass or a perceived and hopeful outcome; good compass or bad compass, it will be the one that determines your direction and judgement in any world of unresponsive triviality and that congregational summation to total indifference and parts to all those definitions of good and bad R; most times there are just no words for it. May be just a salute and move on response? Like a successful goal line stand and those linemen have that look that says it all, no words for it.
The R factor: Is it good? What do you think? Are you a victim? It’s your R. That beauty is and can only be in those eyes of the outcome and there is absolutely no one else in the universe who can and will determine your liability for blame or to magistrate over your response for a better outcome; and unless I miss my point, a no response will scale to the master of all response, reason, creation, and eternal attentiveness.
The greatest realization of sanity for any receptive outcome combatant, is in that competence in coming to responsible terms with that reviewer of cold unbiased apathy: the one who defies any creation or eternity; the parasite whose very existence relies on the freedom to scoff at, demolish, and devour anything that has life and is good; that one who glows among the detestable and vanquished and no amount of whitewashing can conceal the intention of a no R outcome. The greater realization in those advantages of the outcome combatant is; that R can be a multiple of outcome uniqueness, and can be at times a testy, but accountable brotherhood with a language that, for some reason, very few will speak. Did I just hear the Duke say, “It’s your R time Pilgrim.”